Hope To Be Able To Endure All Things

Yesterday was a heavy day.

I attended the funeral for a young woman I have never met. It was quite an experience, attending a funeral for someone you don't know. In a way, it forces you to ponder the impact you are having in the lives of those around you. Are you lifting others us, have you left an impression on their hearts or spirits? I wondered what others would say about my life If I were to pass, what kind of impressions have I left on others? Have I fulfilled the measure of my creation? I also sensed so many broken hearts, heavy and sad hearts that lacked so much hope, for many did not have, or had forgotten the promise that Families Could Be Together Forever.

The load was added to when I found out after the funeral that Jordon's radiation buddy passed away as well. His cancer battle is over finally, and for that I am so joyful. He is no longer in pain. This man changed so many lives, and brought joy to so many others even though he was suffering so greatly. My heart aches for his wife and 2 young children. They are not members of church and do not know about the plan of salvation. I can't help but grieve for the added pain they must feel in possibly believing you may possibly never see your loved one again.

Emotions almost were to overflowing when I found out a girl I grew up with had to have surgery for a brain tumor, and then had to go in for a second surgery is an many days because there was an additional tumor. Emotions and memories flooded back from my sweethearts surgeries and battle, and empathy knowing the possible struggles this young family have before them.

As I pondered, I couldn't help but think of the all encompassing power of the atonement. As my mom and I talked on the drive back from Idaho, she asked, "We have seen so much pain and grief, are we just numb to it now?" I thought about that question, and my answer is a resounding NO!!!

We continued to talk and both came to the conclusion, that while we have endured many trials and struggles, we have allowed the atonement to work within our hearts, bringing peace and joy despite the adversity. As we allow Him to lift our heavy loads, we are free from that which brings us down.

In contrast to the heaviness, there was much joy to be had as well. As I stared at the bright eyes of a friend's sweet baby boy during the class last night, and sensing the strong spirit of another friend's baby, and then seeing a picture of another friend's brand new sweet baby girl, they all radiated with LIGHT and hope and joy and peace (even just photos online)! These new spirits, still so connected with the other side. It is just so humbling, and I was once again reminded of the admonition to become as a little child. so trusting, and full of hope and light....

With things ever hastening, there is much more we will experience. My hope is that, while I have "endured many things", I "hope to be able to endure all things", and I know as long as I always remember our Savior, always turn to him, and work to share His light, I will be able to....